Time is (not) time again

Today seems to be going by very quickly. I (intentionally) didn’t get much sleep last night, and this morning seems to have walked past me in a haze. I noticed that I had got to the last glass of my first half-gallon without going to the bathroom, then remembered getting up to go to the bathroom just moments before. I could not remember more than the first few steps of the trip, and then only because I stopped to say hello to someone. Like, I didn’t really get up, but the memory of it has been planted in my head so that when I try to think back, it is there. Doesn’t worry me that this might be true; just another little quirk of the world I’m immersed in.

I’m thinking of taking up sleeping from when I get home until 10 or 11 at night, then using the whole of the night to get things done. To get things done, I will need to make a list or something; my memory and motivation seem not to do the trick.

Continue reading Time is (not) time again

He’s just this guy, you know?

I have felt a little smothered, though I realize now that I have behaved in precisely the same manner with other people. Is it unfair of me to hold other people to a standard that I myself have failed to meet in the past, or is it too forgiving for me to allow others to trespass in a way that I would not allow myself? He really is a great guy, and he seems to have the right idea about what a relationship should be about, but … there are a couple of things on my mind.

Continue reading He’s just this guy, you know?

Multiplicity of entries

Would you believe that this is the third simultaneous window I have open for entering text onto the site? I have so many things to say, and I very nearly went to bed without finishing them. One of them has been begun since last night before I went to bed, because I knew I had to wake up in the morning. I don’t have to wake up tomorrow morning. I have no plans. I guess I could work on the lawns some more, maybe clean up around the house, go out and see some movies, whatever, but I certainly don’t have to do it in the morning. I can stay up writing as long as I want.

This presents me with an interesting conundrum. Certainly this post will be done soon, and show up as a Friday entry, but will I be able to finish either of the other two active entries in the next 13 and a half minutes, or will they show up as Saturday entries? Does it matter? If they were intended to be coherent, they would be in the same post, right?

I suppose everything will work out fine in the end.

What a funny feeling

I keep thinking to myself that “I’d rather be doing this with Jen.” I was sitting here just now, watching television by myself, being a little silly, and her face when she laughs, the sound of that laughter, occurred to me. Just played lightly across the surface of my mind. It felt good.

I hardly know her, though I’ve known her for years. She’s thousands of miles away, but closer to me than Sara in more ways than physically.