Sorry if I’ve been a little testy in comments recently, I’m a trifle under the weather. I had that same sore throat again, the one Star Wars helped cure before. So this morning, feeling awful, I watched last week’s episode of Enterprise which I had taped, and Star Trek seems to be able to cure the common cold as well.
Well, maybe not cure, but the sore throat is gone and I’m beginning to feel better. When my Unemployment check arrived today, I was able to ride my bike to the bank and pick up some groceries on the way home. No problem. This morning when I woke or last night, I doubt I would have been up to so little a task. So sore, so odd-headed.
My mind doesn’t seem to be working at full speed, but what it’s doing slowly it’s doing methodically and with resolve. Like going through those log files, line by line, until I found more information about the mystery poster. Except that when I was posting on and off about my trying to work it out, my mind wasn’t working quite right, and I don’t want to go look back at what I said.
Then there was a series of conversations over the last couple of days with an old friend. Between barometric shifts (ie: sudden storms) lowering my mood, my impending financial woes just days from cataclysm, not hearing back about my best job opportunity in three months when I was expecting to, conflicts with family about the definition of family and the holidays, my expected bi-annual desire to run a search for a long-missing friend being out of my budget, and then getting sick along with a few other troublesome things, I have found myself mentally off-put. I have saved copies of these conversations on my computer, but somehow I don’t want to go see what it was I said and they said yet. Maybe after my head clears a little. I think it didn’t go well.
Money is becoming problematic. I made a call today to have the last $500 on a revolving line of credit at 15.99% xfered to my checking account so my rent check doesn’t bounce next week. Other payments will try to take themselves automatically out of my checking account on their appropriate due dates in January, and at some point the money won’t be there to transfer anymore. Unemployment is helping, but it obviously isn’t enough. I’m maxed out now on every loan and credit line and credit card I have available. I’m applying for jobs every week and trying to keep my hopes up about this ASU job, but I’m about to find myself in dire straights.
A year ago, at Macworld SF, they announced the new flat screen iMac, and I was financially in a position to buy one that day. This year at Macworld SF, I’m not 100% sure what they’ll announce, but it looks like the tiny 15″ screen iMac I have will be discontinued and a new 19″ will be added to the increasingly fast line of iMacs. All that’s fine, I’m still happy with my iMac, but I’m unhappy that I don’t remotely have the choice to buy one. Also, rumors are that Apple will reveal a new Digital Lifestyle Device at Macworld. No one outside of Apple knows exactly what it is, but there are some good guesses, and I already want to buy it. Maybe an iPod with a color screen and the ability to play video. Maybe a portable computing device on par with Microsoft’s new Tablet PCs. Maybe a digital camera. Maybe a new communication device, something like a phone or an IP-phone, or something unlike anything we’re used to. Regardless, with my current financial situation I won’t be able to afford more than the updated version of iTunes and their rumored new browser. Not being able to afford food and heat and debt payments is one thing, and desperate, but it also means that all the other things in life I want are like the moon and the stars and anyone I’ve ever loved; totally and inconceivably out of reach.
Sneezing now. That’s odd. I wonder why that is. Huh. It’s passed.
I made a test-batch of baccala yesterday, and it came out right, so I’m confident that I’ll be able to make good baccala tomorrow. So every dish and tool I’ll use tomorrow I just used, and need to wash before I go to bed tonight. I don’t want to make everyone sick by contaminating the baccala with this sickness. I was trying to decide if I should split up making the baccala between tonight and tomorrow, but with who knows what germs all over my hands I’ve decided to put it off to the last possible moment.
Luckily, the SciFi Channel has given me something pleasant to do while I sit still all day trying to heal; they are playing all 11 episodes of Season 4 that have aired so far. I’ve only seen one or two of them, so this is a really good thing. I was confused for a while towards the beginning since i missed the last few episodes of Season 3, but I’m doing okay now.