Presort First Class – Postage Paid

Ought to be sleeping.

How many of my posts start that way?

How many of my days start that way?

. . . all the life I’ve lived when I ought to have been sleeping . . .

Work is back to where I like it most, where I do one thing, the same thing, all day long. Less thinking about what I’m going to do when I run out of tickets, more just processing tickets. Counting five by five, counting bucket by bucket, hundreds of tickets back and forth and up and down and mind numbing nicely.

People are still interrupting me with questions about their computers at home, with questions I’m too asleep and too out-of-practise to really answer properly.

And my own mind keeps running. Which is a good thing.

That I have a job that while requiring focus doesn’t require 100% of my mental capacity is a very nice thing. Working on this or that, thinking about whatever. Trying to develop an idea from a glimpse to a screenplay and from a dream to a business proposal to a business. Trying to come up with ideas for comics. And working on ideas for things to do in Second Life. And on and on and daydreaming and . . .

And wishing I had an iPod.

Every day that I have to sit between two people, each playing their own stereo tuned to a different station and neither one playing music I would have chosen, is another day that reinforces in me the need for my own personal portable music experience. Seriously, I just want to put a pair of white earbuds into my ears, pull up one of my smart playlists, and listen to my own collection of music instead of … two disparate selections at once and never a song I really like. Sigh.

The money will be there eventually.

I’ve just got to be careful, and be sure I understand my own priorities.

If I had the money for the iBook I want, I could get an iPod for a real steal with one of their current promotions. But I haven’t got that money saved up/paid back yet. And by the time I do, that promotion will be over. And my desire for an iPod will be excessive.

Got to have money for Florida.

Got to have money for bills and food and internet.

Like to save up (ie: pay back debtors so I can afford to spend more) for nice things like iBook, iPod, new iMac (hah! I don’t get paid that much!). Like to save up for Nintendo DS and some games for it. Like to have money for Fable next month. (Fable, the game that made me choose XBox over PS2 originally, finally arriving.)

Like to go on a cruise – I can get a sweet deal while I work for ICE, but I’ve got to have the vacation money available, obviously.

Can’t buy a car. Just can’t.

Like, if someone gifted me a fully functional car with reasonable gas mileage, I might be able to afford the insurance, gas, and maintenance on it. But car payments on top of that? Right out.

Probably something to do with my car-loan-sized outstanding debt and the payments I have to make on that and the ridiculous interest I pay on it.

I must suck.

My wrists are going bad from all the repetitive tickets business. And my right bicep is going crazy. Maybe it’ll get bigger or something. It’s all sore and tired. At the very least I suspect that it’ll be really really good at a couple of very particular motions repeated hundreds of times a day.

Somehow still not sleeping. But I will. Go. Try that. Now.

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Author, artist, romantic, insomniac, exorcist, creative visionary, lover, and all-around-crazy-person.