The following is a response to this post by my brother – duplicated here in case he thinks he can censor me, and to get my own readers’ feedback on the subject:
How about I want you to sleep at night instead of staying up chatting all night? The 18 thing is that theoretically since you’ll be an adult you can be trusted to make your own good choices, though I doubt a birthday is going to change anything for you.
You have to fucking sleep at night and you have to pass your fucking classes and you have to do all that damned correspondence work, right? You can be sitting around chatting with your friends (and enemies) online all night, every night until who-knows-when in the morning.
Porn? I don’t care. Obviously. I’m practically a porn addict. That isn’t the point.
And wanting to use your computer IS a factor, and I’ll admit that, but it isn’t the primary one.
As with anyone I care about, I want the best for you. I want you to succeed. I want to do whatever I can to help you to succeed, and while I can, I want to do whatever I can to force you to succeed. Do you homework! Get enough sleep that you can pay attention in your early classes! And so that you can feel better and not be so angty and/or depressed all the time!
And then there’s the whole issue of “privacy” which I don’t believe in, and I don’t support people wanting to have.
If you want to do something and you feel like it should be kept a secret or done in the “privacy” of your room, youprobably shouldn’t be doing it. Anything you do that you feel ashamed of in any way, anything you do that you don’t want other people to know about, almost anything you do or want to do that you don’t want to do right out in the open – you shouldn’t be doing.
Without religion, without laws, without a moral code, you inherently know right from wrong – just like every other being in the universe. Without anyone having to teach you, you know what things you should be doing and what things you want to do in secret – the ones you want to be doing in secret you shouldn’t be doing at all.
This applies to everyone. Everywhere. Not just you. So the question shouldn’t be why I want your computer out in the open, but why YOU want your computer in private. What do you think you’re doing in there that you can’t do out here?
Oh, and I think we determined to just move Angela’s computer to the next room and put yours here on the desk. No need to switch it – that would mean Angela would never get to use her computer, since you go to school at the same times she works (and are off at the same times, of course).
As far as deleting your blog/login, you’re silly. I have never censored anyone on Modern Evil. The only times I’ve ever removed accounts were because either people asked me to, or after providing over a month’s notice that inactive accounts would be removed, I removed inactive accounts and blogs. And your blog qualified as “inactive” according to even the loosest interpretation of my guidelines (5 posts in July) but I didn’t delete it after speaking to you about it.
In fact, the only time I can remember being upset with what someone was doing on Modern Evil was when one of my users was censoring people’s comments. I don’t like censoring on my site.
So if you still don’t understand why you can’t have your computer in your room, let me know. Because you need to give a valid explanation as to why you SHOULD have your computer in your room.
he said:
I’m done. nothing is right. It’s not like I have a chance of even passing those classes if I were to try anyway. I’m fucking pissed at you for this, and I know I don’t have a right, but fuck… I’m done. Whatever, I’m done, I hate it, I hate everything, I’m so fucking done.
Posted by: Warpshadow on August 5, 2004 04:11 PM
April – had a kid
Teel – is manipulative
Angela – overreacts
Heath – procrastinates
You don’t really think I’m gonna change the family trend of failure do you?
And yes, I am aware this will probably piss everyone off, since it personally insults each of us.
Damn, and I thought I could actually have a decent day. Fucking hell I was so fucking wrong.
Posted by: Warpshadow on August 5, 2004 04:25 PM
so I said:
What do you mean “you’re done”? Why do you think you couldn’t pass the classes if you tried? The ONLY thing standing between you and passing your classes is YOU TRYING. If I’m upset right now it’s because you assume you’re destined to failure, when in fact you are only limted by your own choices. If you would choose to succeed, you would succeed.
The same as every member of this family.
A year before April went bankrupt she had all the information and knowledge and ability she needed to get her finances in order to avoid it, but at the time she decided (like you’re doing now about school) that it’s pointless, that she was destined to fail, and she did. She chose to fail, and she succeeded at what she chose to do.
Angela knows that if she takes care of herself (goes to the doctor, the dentist, stays on her prescriptions, whatever) she’ll feel better and be happier. But when she runs out of drugs, when she feels bad, when her teeth rot out of her head, she chooses not to do anything about it. She chooses to feel bad, to over-react, to let her teeth rot away, and she succeeds at what she chooses to do.
I wish anyone, anyone in the world, ever, would give me some sort of explanation with examples of why they think I’m “manipulative”. Every time someone tells me I’m manipulative I ask them to explain with examples so I can try to change my behaviour or at least change that perception, but so far zero people have been able to come up with concrete examples. If that’s all that’s wrong with me, I’m more successful than I’d hoped.
As far as I know I’m up front about things. Like with the computer situation; I never denied or hid any of the reasons I don’t want it in your room, to anyone. I don’t want you up all night because I don’t like to see you fail at school and feel bad, I don’t believe in privacy, and I’d like to use it once in a while.
You lived with me for six months; how often did I use your computer? What? I played through URU once. If you think this is all about that, you’re fooling yourself. I’ve been playing Second Life on my computer about every other day; if I have to keep on doing it here, it’ll just motivate me to get a new computer earlier than I’d been planning to.
I still haven’t heard even a weak explanation as to why you “can’t” pass your classes, or why you want your computer in your room. You can succeed at anything you choose to apply yourself fully to. It’s a fact. The only thing about yourself you cannot change is the past; everything else is mutable, including “failure” and “success” and even “happiness”.
What do you want to choose?
he said:
I’m done. nothing is right. It’s not like I have a chance of even passing those classes if I were to try anyway. I’m fucking pissed at you for this, and I know I don’t have a right, but fuck… I’m done. Whatever, I’m done, I hate it, I hate everything, I’m so fucking done.
Posted by: Warpshadow on August 5, 2004 04:11 PM
April – had a kid
Teel – is manipulative
Angela – overreacts
Heath – procrastinates
You don’t really think I’m gonna change the family trend of failure do you?
And yes, I am aware this will probably piss everyone off, since it personally insults each of us.
Damn, and I thought I could actually have a decent day. Fucking hell I was so fucking wrong.
Posted by: Warpshadow on August 5, 2004 04:25 PM
so I said:
What do you mean “you’re done”? Why do you think you couldn’t pass the classes if you tried? The ONLY thing standing between you and passing your classes is YOU TRYING. If I’m upset right now it’s because you assume you’re destined to failure, when in fact you are only limted by your own choices. If you would choose to succeed, you would succeed.
The same as every member of this family.
A year before April went bankrupt she had all the information and knowledge and ability she needed to get her finances in order to avoid it, but at the time she decided (like you’re doing now about school) that it’s pointless, that she was destined to fail, and she did. She chose to fail, and she succeeded at what she chose to do.
Angela knows that if she takes care of herself (goes to the doctor, the dentist, stays on her prescriptions, whatever) she’ll feel better and be happier. But when she runs out of drugs, when she feels bad, when her teeth rot out of her head, she chooses not to do anything about it. She chooses to feel bad, to over-react, to let her teeth rot away, and she succeeds at what she chooses to do.
I wish anyone, anyone in the world, ever, would give me some sort of explanation with examples of why they think I’m “manipulative”. Every time someone tells me I’m manipulative I ask them to explain with examples so I can try to change my behaviour or at least change that perception, but so far zero people have been able to come up with concrete examples. If that’s all that’s wrong with me, I’m more successful than I’d hoped.
As far as I know I’m up front about things. Like with the computer situation; I never denied or hid any of the reasons I don’t want it in your room, to anyone. I don’t want you up all night because I don’t like to see you fail at school and feel bad, I don’t believe in privacy, and I’d like to use it once in a while.
You lived with me for six months; how often did I use your computer? What? I played through URU once. If you think this is all about that, you’re fooling yourself. I’ve been playing Second Life on my computer about every other day; if I have to keep on doing it here, it’ll just motivate me to get a new computer earlier than I’d been planning to.
I still haven’t heard even a weak explanation as to why you “can’t” pass your classes, or why you want your computer in your room. You can succeed at anything you choose to apply yourself fully to. It’s a fact. The only thing about yourself you cannot change is the past; everything else is mutable, including “failure” and “success” and even “happiness”.
What do you want to choose?
I answered on his blog, but don’t think it’s necessary to repeat it here. Of course if you do be my guest, just wanted you to know that it’s there.
I answered on his blog, but don’t think it’s necessary to repeat it here. Of course if you do be my guest, just wanted you to know that it’s there.
Simply because we have boundaries, is not to say we aren’t moral. The privacy we keep is our right, not something to be denied.
r
Simply because we have boundaries, is not to say we aren’t moral. The privacy we keep is our right, not something to be denied.
r