My brain aches

I can feel it all the way down through my jaw, this strange pressure. Probably just sinuses, and not like any of the severe pain I’ve experienced in my life. Not like every time I lost HER. (And yes, we all know who HER is…) Just … pressure… a gentle ache in the bones of my head…

Am I asleep yet? There is something about being here, in this urban center, 100 miles from where I live … I seem to spend more… but then again, when I am not here, I basically don’t leave the 1acre plot I live on except to retrieve the mail… across the street and four buildings down… and don’t have the opportunity or need to spend… whereas here I am surrounded by objects of desire. Tonight I bought enough on-sale easter candy to last me not less than 3 months, probably 6 months. I didn’t even count it, I just grabbed a basket as I walked into the grocery store and stopped grabbing bags of individually wrapped, pastel-colored miniature candies and egg-shaped candies when the basket was full. When they rang it up, it was $50 of candy before the oh-yeah-it’s-past-easter-please-take-this-pastel-colored-candy-away-discount was applied. Oh, and I guess The Warehouse is going out of business or something; my sister took me to two of their nearly-empty locations with 70% or 75% or more off everything left… which wasn’t much to speak of, but I managed to find … yeah, yeah, I have too many DVDs… 7 DVDs I wanted…. plus a little bracelet that says ‘Godess’ for a friend of mine… for something like $40… which makes them about $6 apiece, right? Anyway…

Then we went to see Spider. The new David Cronenberg film. Fantastically weird. Crazy. Crazy in a ‘main character doesn’t do much more than mumble the entire film’ sort of a way… My sister could hear him mumbling incoherently and seemed to want there to be subtitles of what he was saying… and very shortly thereafter, we saw him writing in his little book …. and I swear, if there were an alphabet for mumbling, that’s what he was using… if they were going to subtitle his speach, that’s what it would look like, and it wouldn’t help. Still, Ralph Feines is an excellent actor, and it all came together nice and confusing (for my sister) at the end.

Okay, okay, now sleep. Where did I put my sleep? Oh yeah, I was just waiting for my allergy medicine to kick in before I lay down… did I ever mention that the cats here love me? And by love me, I mean that they like to walk back and forth across me whenever possible, especially when I’m trying to sleep. And that I’m allergic to them? It’s fantastic. So, I forgot to take my pill right when I came back in the door from the movie, and that’s why I was bothering to post here. It seems to have kicked in… I’m only sneezing intermittantly, and my right eye’s swelling has gone down considerable well; I can just about shut it now. So, off to bed.

I’ll be here in Phoenix all day/night Tuesday, and … well… I may end up going to Mexico on Wednesday. I’m thinking of smuggling some DEA-scheduled drugs over the border. Modafinil, I believe is the name. Of course, if that doesn’t work, there’s something my sister wanted to pick up for herself there, which would be the real reason for the trip… Nevermind. Seriously, now. Sleep.

Oh yeah, and… Women? Still evil. And… if you think I’m talking about you, or MIGHT BE talking about you… I am. You’re evil.

Not every moment, but deep at your core. Evil.

Good night.