I haven’t had a chance to followup on the issue of the girl I ran into last Saturday night. It isn’t as dire as some people seem to think. No, I haven’t received an email. Yes, I do believe it was her. No, I am not overly frazzled about the ordeal at this time. In fact, due to my interpretation of the situation and other outside factors, I have lately felt very much at peace. If anything, I am more at peace now than I was before the incident.
Think about it: I’ve been searching for this person for nearly five years and out of the blue I see that she is alive and well. Unless I assume something catastrophic has occurred in the last week, I can assume that she is still alive and well. This is better than what I had two weeks ago, re: the missing girl. This is not as good as my fondest hopes and dreams, but luckily I am able to understand that life is not always like a dream, and sometimes a little bit is the best you can hope for from a dream in real life.
So, I’m thinking of what to say in a letter the the address I got for her mother that I will send this time certified of return service or … something, and I’m sure that unless that pans out I’ll be running some sort of search on her name in the early summer. Just to check up on her. Because I still care.
Not because I’m frantic or desperate or believe sincerely that a relationship will form out of the aether, but because I love her and care about her well-being and I would like to able to believe that if I learned that she was in trouble I could be able to help. Like you would for a loved one. I guess that’s the problem with being alone for so long; I don’t have enough outlet for all the love I want to give.
So, don’t worry about me, and don’t worry about the situation. Nothing about it has changed this year, and probably won’t any time soon. And I’m good with that.