Limited Edition Triple Chocolate

So, a new friend of mine from work found out I wrote some books, and after taking a look at them decided that she wanted to buy one of each. I said I’d give her a ~$2 discount for buying all three, asking only $50 for the set, and actually saved her $5+ on shipping too, since she was ready to order them online via the link above. Now, on Wednesday when she said she’d buy them all she didn’t have the cash, but I – being a generally nice guy about such things – decided to let her take the books home, trusting that she would pay for them today as she had promised.

But apparently one of them, the one she chose to read first, was the most offensively horrible thing she had ever experienced. Well, gauging from the look on her face as she failed to describe what she didn’t like about it in much detail. Oh, wait. That was her primary complaint; too much description of detail. She wished in each short story (none longer than 5 pages, I believe), that I had just gotten to the point faster. She was very frustrated with having to read all the useless nonsense of descriptive and evocative details, she wanted to get to the action. Fine. Well, those short stories (and poems, I might add) were not the way to go, then. They are primarily exercizes in evoking a detailed scene and emotional state within the mind, and any action that occurs is secondary at best, only there to get to the next detailed description of something poignant. So, yeah. Poor choice there.

So based on that experience she decided she didn’t like my writing at all. I mean, the other two novels were effectively written within the last two years and not even begun within 7 years of the writing of the most recent piece in the short fiction and poetry collection – I’m fairly certain there are differences in my writing style. But maybe there aren’t. Maybe nothing happens in 300 pages but detailed descriptions of the ends of the world and car accidents and men with super powers who never use them but discover them in enriched and glorifying detail through the course of their unfolding, and layoffs and relationships gone wrong and then the last 100+ pages or so cover less than 48 hours in agonizingly blissful and extensive detail – everything from the details of cooking an elaborate meal to taking a long bath to an entire chapter on choosing clothes and getting dressed – and at the end one isn’t sure if anything happened at all… And maybe that’s the book she didn’t give back.

See, if there hadn’t been “some damage” to Lost and Not Found, she would have apparently returned it along with Dragons’ Truth, which she did return. So she ended up just buying the two, which is better than buying none, and helps me to pay for the groceries that I’m eating even now. So, good and bad. More book sales is always better than less.

Which is why, for anyone interested who can meet me in person one way or another before I run out of them, I am putting my remaining copies of Dragons’ Truth on sale for the ~$2 off price of $15.

I have SIX copies of Dragons’ Truth from my most recent wholesale order from Cafepress. They are all either signed or are available for signing as you wish. They will each be offered for $15 to anyone who mentions that I posted here about that price specifically, until all 6 are sold. It really is a good book, and based on what this particular person has said about her taste in my writing, I believe it would have been her favorite of the three books I’ve put together. It’s slightly more of an adventure, especially towards the end.

I mean, forgetting about the whole ‘doomsday comes’ aspect of Lost and Not Found, I mean.

Oh, and I only have one remaining copy each of my other two books. They are available at their regular price unless you order them in combination with Dragons’ Truth AND mention that I posted this offer: If you buy all three books, my last LaNf, my last tVC, and one of the SIX copies of D’T I have, I will give you ~$6 off the lot instead of just two; all three books for $46. That’s $2 savings ber book, and basically means I don’t make any money giving them to you.

I’m just hoping you’ll be more satisfied than this person was and recommend them to your friends instead of, you know, looking like you want to vomit.

And this whole offer reminds me of another thing I mean to do privately, but will announce here anyway:

I would like to offer a FREE copy of Dragons’ Truth to an illustrator or artist whose work I appreciate, in exchange for considering illustrating for it … well, FREE. Primarily I’m looking for a new cover or cover image, but if an illustrator or artist found themselves with the inspiration, time, and personal resources to create illustrations to go in the body of the book, that would be excellent.

I am willing to offer a portion of all profits from sales of all editions of the book containing their illunstrations, but am unwilling to get mucked up in a legal dispute and will agree to no more than an informal arrangement. I can be trusted, but I don’t trust lawyers, or those who stand behind them for protection. Something appropriate can be worked out if any illustrators are interested AND enjoy the book. Something simple and straightforward like, I am free to choose to use or not use the images provided, and will gladly stop using the art upon the request of the artist, plus maybe something like $1 from the sale of each full-priced book with the illustrations/cover art included would go directly to the artist… something handled on a single-person to single-person basis.

Anyway, I have an artist or two in mind who I will probably (assuming time and mental resources permit) be contacting soon. But I’d like you to assume I’m talking about you, and for you to just ask me about it. At the very least, if you express reasonable interest and I appreciate your artwork (assume I do – you’re probably better than me, and that goes a long way), you can get a free book out of it, and then say you didn’t have any ideas for the cover or insides. Easy peasy.

And now to bed. I slept only three hours this morning, and it looks to be only four or five tonight. Maybe I should work on that. I wonder if I should work on it being more, or less?

Oh, and of course, just email me at just about anything at modern evil dot com (though teel at modern evil dot com is prefered, and less likely to end up filtered as spam) if you’re interested in my books. At discount, bulk discount, or free. Thanks.

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Author, artist, romantic, insomniac, exorcist, creative visionary, lover, and all-around-crazy-person.