I wish I’d burned out

“It is better to burn out than to fade away.” – Kurgan

This party was supposed to be the last big bash. The last party. A big one, a good time. See all my friends and old friends and have a good time and a great party and then move to my new place and disappear. So that people remember me happy and having a good time and have fond memories of my parties. So I can remember them as having a good time, and have fond memories of being able to throw good parties.

Alas, that is not what has occurred. Instead, the few people that bothered to show up will remember only a disappointing party, where they basically only saw the people they brought with them as the entire party. Not with a bang, but a whimper. I guess I didn’t try hard enough to invite people. I guess I didn’t sell people on the idea of the party, or I am running out of friends (as I have suspected and commented on here before), or … who knows? I got my hopes up, and they were dashed aside. I was able to remain hopeful that people would show up until around 1:20AM, because several people said they expected to be able to show up after midnight. They did not.

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Author, artist, romantic, insomniac, exorcist, creative visionary, lover, and all-around-crazy-person.