The Matrix Revolutions – Un-Spoiled

The Oracle is a human, working for the EVIL AI. Agent Smith likes kittens. Zion is destroyed in record time, with every ‘free’ human killed in less time than it takes to get a refill on your popcorn, and then Neo loses the big climactic battle and the Matrix crashes, killing every last human connected to it. The Merovingian is secretly controlling Agent Smith, and when Bane finally wakes up, he speaks in french. That runner from the Animatrix who woke up from running too fast is actually behind the current war, peace having been met between humans and AI years ago, but broken by that runner over a little matter of a sexy nurse and a key. Trinity is actually Neo’s mother, and Neo is actually Smith’s father. And that little girl in the trailer?

YOUR mother.


Okay, so expect a “No Spoiler” review and a “FULL OF SPOILERS” review from me later.

This one is just silly.

I’ve seen the movie, but … I’m not ready to say anything about it yet, I haven’t processed it all, yet. But, I’m about to go see it again, apparently. So. For now, know that the Twins are more powerful and important than anyone ever imagined. Watch for their spin-off, next fall.

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